Teenagers

    All my life I have had the upmost confidence. I have never wanted to be someone else. I have never wanted to be different than what I am. I was proud of myself and who I was. But that was when I was young, naive, innocent. When I didn't know anything of the world and its horrors of humanity. When I didn't have to accept life, when I actually lived it. I was a happy child now...I'm...just an ok child.

    A child's goals are simple. "All you need is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure." - Mark Twain But if you loose either you are now an adult and therefore those rules no longer apply, for your innocence is lost.

    Teenage Life is the begining of all human beings. When you are born, you learn how to use your body. When you are a child you learn to use your mind. When you get older you learn to use both of these tools to combine yourself as a properly functioning human being.

   But your soul hasn't been formed yet.

    When you reach your teenage years this is when the last part of the puzzle comes into place, emotion. This is when your soul is formed, when every form of emotion is tested on you in every situation. Your teenage years are the start of your life and who you are.

   When you're a teenager it seems everything is in touching reach, but really your dreams are so far away. When your a teenager, open to all the resources of the world as you grow to be an adult it seems as though your childhood dreams are now possible, that maybe you can be that Lone Ranger or Princess.  It seems you can do anything, accomplish anything and then...you are faced with the cold reality. The fact that you can't. When your childhood dies...your old "soul" seems to die as you try to find out who you really are.

"Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live." - Mark Twain

   Because here comes the next step. Dissapointment, Acceptance, Depression. (DAD-no pun intended) You are an adult and you learn that you are not meant to live life, you are merely meant to accept it...with all its flaws. No, you are supposed to do more than accept it, you are supposed to ignore it. Ignorance is truely bliss.

    Basically, your childhood dreams are crushed. Your whole life we have lied to you, telling you you could succeed but really you are doomed to failure no matter what your profession. You will reach your middle ages. You will cry yourself to sleep thinking, my life is almost over...what have I done? You will regret everything you've ever done and you will die an unhappy person. That is the punishment for human life.

    "I have no color prejudices nor caste prejudices nor creed prejudices. All I care to know is that a man is a human being, and that is enough for me; he can't be any worse."- Mark Twain (My favorite quote)

    I have struggled through the process of life and though I am only thirteen, I see all its flaws and I know what is to become of me.

   I still dream, I still try, I still hope it won't be what I think. But that is humanity acting upon me again, telling me what to think, to hope, to dream as every child does. I know that when I die it will be the same as anyone else dies a cold shock that my life has finally ended, that I, thinking I would be great died like everyone else. That I am human, I am not extraordinary and for that fact I am dissapointed ashamed, I could not be something else.

     "Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat."- Mark Twain

   I have lost faith in humanity, but I have not lost faith in myself and as a human I hope I can be different, I hope like Mark Twain humanity will improve yet I know it won't. Because the fact that we are human limits us from being anything else.

Love, Kay